Alone Time

Spending some quality time by yourself can make a world of difference in your thinking and in your body. But making yourself a priority, even once in a while, is really hard for many of us – especially those of us with family responsibilities. However, spending time alone can recharge your spirit in ways that being with people, even ones we love, cannot. Here are some reasons to be alone, and ways to make solitude easier (because it’s hard in our ever more constantly connected world) and productive.

1. Dump the guilt and realize that being alone doesn’t mean lonely, sad or antisocial. Our culture tends to turn a desire for solitude into a bad thing. But seeking alone time can be healthy, with plenty of psychological and physical benefits. Some people, particularly women, feel guilty about taking time for themselves. As caregivers, we should be taking care of everyone else, right? But taking care of yourself not only models healthy behavior for others, it keeps you happy, healthy, and strong.

2. Schedule time alone and disconnect. Set aside some time each day to unplug from everything and everyone. You can wake up early, get to the office early or stay late, stay up later than everyone, or even use your lunch hour as a break for yourself. Turn off all your devices. Meditate. Write in a journal. Walk. Sit in the sun outside. Go to a park and eat lunch. Enjoy the time you have alone. Once a week or month, schedule a whole day when you get away from everyone – go to the movies by yourself, eat a meal alone, go for a solo hike, bike ride or drive.

3. Alone time allows you to relax and actually give your brain a chance to rest. Being “on” all the time means your brain is also “on.” It needs a chance to catch up, rest and recharge. Being by yourself means you can clear your mind, focus, and think more clearly.

4. Solitude helps boost concentration and productivity. By removing distractions and interruptions, your concentration will increase tremendously! You’ll be able to get much more done in a shorter period of time.

5. Quality time alone allows you to discover yourself. Being part of a group is wonderful, but it’s tempting to always go along with the group’s decisions and opinions. That may not always be the action or thinking you would follow if you were on your own. The clearer you are on your own thinking, decision making and needs, the more you can contribute to the group.

6. Solitude can mean time to think. I don’t know about you, but my to-do list is endless! The temptation to add to it all the time often means putting off thinking other, equally important, thoughts. This can stifle creativity and actually make you less productive as a whole. Distractions are everywhere – your television, computer or any other electronic device; even the people we love the most can often be a distraction. It’s hard to think of a solution any problem, big or small, when these distractions are disrupting your focus.

7. Alone time can enhance your relationships with others. By spending time with yourself and getting a better handle on who you are and what you want, you’ll have more clarity about who you want to your spend time with and why. You’ll appreciate your relationships even more! 

8. Don’t be afraid to close your door. Or if you don’t have a door, put a sign on your wall that asks people to come back later. If your space can’t be closed off from distractions, try wearing noise-cancelling headphones to block the world out. Once you begin making time for yourself, you may run into resistance from others – they want your attention like always! But don’t let that stop you. Let them know that you’re still there for them, but you need your designated alone time. They’ll quickly realize that you taking time for yourself means you’ll be back to them refreshed.

The demands of life and business can mean finding time for ourselves is a challenge. But the effort is worth it – both for your body and your spirit. Now, there’s no “one-size-fits-all” formula for solitude. Try different activities for 15 minutes at a time and see which work best for you. Or take an hour, or a day. Sometimes all it takes is a bit of fine tuning. A refreshed, enlightened and confident person is better than being stressed out, distracted and grumpy, right? Just sayin’.

Published: New Mexico Apartment News Magazine – March/April issue 2016